Before I start I just want to say that when I mention “bad dates” I’m referring to dates that are unpleasant, not dates in which harm comes to you in any way whether it is physical or mental. A bad date is when the person and or the date itself sucks, being assaulted in any way during a date is not a “bad date” but rather, a traumatic event. If you’ve had a date where a traumatic event has occurred whether physical or mental, please get all the help you can. Moving on.
I recently watched this video from Dates with Kate (which I highly recommend that you watch) and what I got from the video was this:
Treat every date you’re on as a learning experience. Take what you learn and date better.
You can learn from the good and the bad, just go into your new dating experience with the idea that at the very least, you can gather a positive from this date.
If you go on 100 Dates you’re bound to learn something about yourself but trust me, even 10% of that is enough to figure out that at the very minimum you want to date a guy who WONT show up to a date wearing Vibrams (and yes, that has happened to a friend of mine).
I’ve learned that there are certain professions that I generally can’t date for the most part.
I have nothing against bartenders but I know that my schedule is 9-5 and for the most part, a bartender will most likely NOT have that schedule.
I’m definitely not going on dates at midnight on a thursday because yes, I have a day job.
I learned this because I went on dates with bartenders
I also know that I can’t date people who only hang out in certain neighborhoods. I learned this through dating hipsters who refused to leave Williamsburg
I’ve also learned that you should at least make an attempt to kiss on the first date. Not force someone to kiss you obviously, but lean in for the kiss. This saves you from going on a 2nd date with someone who probably isn’t that interested but who thinks you’re a nice person. I learned this by going on dates where I didn’t
I have a laundry list of things I’ve learned through dating (I mean, you’ve read my posts before) so trust me: Each date is a learning experience
Good dates are like little seminars that teach you something good. Bad dates are like studying for a really difficult test. It sucks, want to get it over with as soon as possible, but once it’s done you never have to do it again (I would hope)
Even if the only thing you learn after going on dates is that you hate dating, at least you learned something
Good Luck out there